Liner Notes: Lilith
- Taylor & Lauren
- Feb 13
- 5 min read
There comes a point when desire is no longer enough. When wanting without protection begins to cost too much. When being generous starts to feel like disappearing. This playlist was created for that moment: the moment a woman realizes that self-denial is not devotion, and that love which requires erasure is not love at all.
In Jewish myth, Lilith was the first woman. She was created from the same earth as Adam…not from his rib, not after him, and not for him. Lilith refused hierarchy from the start. When Adam demanded dominance, she refused and walked away. Mythology, at this point, recast her as a demon. She became the container for everything patriarchal culture fears about female autonomy.
Beneath that demon mask, the real fear was Lilith being “unowned.” She would not make herself smaller to preserve harmony. She said “no” without apology. She was desire that didn’t ask permission and sexuality that wouldn’t orient around male comfort. Instead of asking, “Am I allowed,” she asked, “Is this aligned?” Lilith was the self who chose exile over erasure.
Our Lilith playlist is broken into three parts: Desire, Boundaries, and Unapologetic Selfhood. Desire is the ignition – it’s not romance or fantasy; it’s truth at its core. The body claiming a want. Lilith’s desire isn’t ornamental…it’s self-recognition. Desire is the moment we stop pretending we don’t feel what we feel.
Boundaries are the spell that protects desire. They are what keeps desire from being consumed. Lilith doesn’t set boundaries because she is cold; she sets them because she is precise. Her boundary says, “You do not get access just because you want me. Love does not require my submission. I will not shrink in order to be chosen.” Boundary is desire saying “no” to what distorts it. It is the shape of our self-respect.
Unapologetic Selfhood is the embodiment. It’s what happens when desire is honored and protected. It is not loud – it is settled. Lilith does not argue her worth – she does not audition. She does not soften the truth just to keep the peace. Lilith simply is and lets others rearrange themselves accordingly. We are no longer asking to be understood. We are choosing to be true. Desire is sacred, boundaries are holy, and selfhood is non-negotiable.
Section 1: DESIRE
Open (Rhye) – Consent as atmosphere. Breath, skin, and invitation without agenda. It opens the body without asking it to give anything up.
Skin (Rihanna) – The body awakens from inside itself. Private heat. No audience and no performance – there is just sensation in this song.
Honey (Kehlani) – Desire here becomes chosen sweetness. It’s mutual, unguarded, but still self-possessed. This is Lilith allowing closeness on her terms.
Fade Into You (Mazzy Star) – Becomes dreamy and porous. Because of placement in the list, it represents shared gravity rather than pining – it’s a soft place before depth.
Constant Craving (k.d. Lang) – Craving here is for the truth, alignment, and authenticity. Mid-list, this becomes existential desire…not emotional lack.
Is There Somewhere (Halsey) – We enter the private room…quiet, intimate, and chosen with a purpose. This is desire whispered after the door is closed, not begged for in the hallway.
Mary Magdalene (FKA Twigs) – The axis of the Desire section. This is sacred, erotic autonomy. It’s the refusal to be consumed. The previous songs prepped for this and the songs after flow from it.
Glory Box (Portishead) – Desire is named without apology. It’s sultry, grounded, and adult. This desire is not submissive or defensive…it’s honest.
Criminal (Fiona Apple) – This is acknowledgement of the shadow. Desire is examined – not indulged blindly. Late placement in the list represents self-awareness, not shame.
Damn I Wish I Was Your Lover (Sophie B. Hawkins) – This song is desire being bold, embodied, and playful. It’s no longer yearning. Now it’s a choice we’ve voiced aloud.
Burning (Yeah Yeah Yeahs) – This is the end of the desire section. Desire is integrated. It’s heat without chaos. Karen O perfectly holds the line between feral and sovereign.
Section 2: BOUNDARIES
Fast Car (Tracy Chapman) – Boundaries begin here where it’s lucid. This song is the moment Lilith realizes “Love is not supposed to feel like this.” It’s not a boundary yet, but it’s clarity dawning.
Precious Things (Tori Amos) – Anger surfaces, but it’s righteous – not reckless. “You took more than I consented to give.” This is internal fire: necessary and contained, but just enough seething to count.
Hunter (Björk) – This is the turning point where the boundary becomes internal first: “I am responsible for my own becoming.” There are no accusations and no chasing – this is self-retrieval.
You Oughta Know (Alanis Morisette) – This only works when it comes after the self-recognition so that it becomes truth spoken without cushioning instead of messy revenge. “I will not protect you from the consequences of knowing what you did.”
Cornflake Girl (Tori Amos) – This song is about betrayal disguised as sweetness – the social enforcement of silence, obedience, and “niceness.” A boundary is against systems – not just people.
Goodbye Yellow Brick Road (Sara Bareilles) – The calm center of the boundary section. There is no drama or explanation. Just a calm, “This isn’t my life. I’m leaving.”
You Don’t Own Me (Brenna Whitaker) – The boundary is finally named aloud. It’s not angry – it’s elegant and final, spoken with the whole chest. Lilith with her spine, fully returned to her body.
Beggin’ for Thread (BANKS) – Self-containment. “I am no longer over-giving. I am no longer available for extraction.” This is a dark, controlled, modern Lilith.
These Boots Are Made for Walkin’ (Nancy Sinatra) – This is the exit of the boundary section. Devoid of cruelty and chaos, this is standing up to say, “I’m done,” as we walk away.
Section 3: UNAPOLOGETIC SELFHOOD
Uninvited (Alanis Morisette) – The line that selfhood claimed without apology, but it’s not yet softened or “lived in.”
Little Earthquakes (Tori Amos) – Internal landscape. Selfhood as something alive, shifting, and powerful…but also private.
Pearls (Sade) – Compassion enters without self-erasure. She sees suffering but does not volunteer herself to be consumed by it.
Golden (Jill Scott) – The body moves again in joy, without justification. This is presence without defense. She is living…not proving.
Brown Skin (India Arie) – Stillness, inhabitation, and reverence. “I move freely. I rest comfortably inside myself.” This is embodiment without narration.
Halo (Beyoncé) – Self-recognition through clarity as opposed to surrender. She sees clearly and does not disappear into someone else.
Video (India Arie) – This is definition without defiance. She dismantles the gaze without fighting it. She chooses not to perform for the mirror anymore.
Both Sides Now (Joni Mitchell) – Wisdom, not bitterness. She has earned her perspective. This Lilith is older, softer, and still sovereign.
I Know Where I’ve Been (Queen Latifah) – Testimony, history, and a voice reclaimed. This is communal selfhood. “I stand here because I walked here.”
I AM Woman (TRiBE) – A declaration – modern, grounded, and within the body. She’s not yelling; she’s stating facts.
Songbird (Eva Cassidy) – We come to the end, which instead of a yawp of ownership, is a soft landing. There’s no armor here. This is a woman singing solely because she exists.
We chose Lilith because women deserve to be whole without being punished for it. Because self-preservation has been mislabeled as selfishness for too long. Because love that requires women to abandon themselves is not love – it is extraction. The playlist is a journey from desire to boundaries to unapologetic selfhood, not to harden women, but to let them remain generous without disappearing.
Lilith didn’t reject love.
She rejected erasure - and so do we.
Additional Resources
Book: Embracing Lilith by Mark H. Williams
Blog: "Sumerian Goddess Lilith, Adam's First Wife" by Anna Lindberg
Video: The Entire Story of Lilith: The Forgotten Tale of Adam's First Companion (on YouTube)
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