"True love cannot begin until the 'in love' has run its course."
-Gary Chapman
Everyone is talking bout love this month, but what is it really? And what type of love do they mean? Being February, stores are stuffed to the gills with cards, chocolates, flowers, jewelry, and any other trinkets that could possibly convey romance come the 14th. There are so many competing hypotheses as to where the true origin of Valentine's Day lies (including both decapitation and a Roman bacchanal, though not together...), so we won't get into that debate; however, current Valentine's Day is completely removed from any of its possible beginnings.
So what about the origins of our relationships? Initially, we present our best selves as we believe the other person would best receive us. We spend time on our image, we're careful about what we say and how we say it, and we (many times subconsciously) hide our authentic Self. Likewise, we view the other person through an unrealistic lens. In the beginning, we aren't trying to see reality - we see them as we are, not as they are. Eventually, that cloud starts to part and we see glimpses of reality.
It's once that veil of illusion is lifted that we find out whether we can love the other person's authentic Self. When we're blinded by initial love, lust, or even admiration, we love our idea of the person...but do we love the person? If so, that's when the real journey starts and growth begins. That's when we also feel free to show parts of our authentic Self until we've fully revealed ourselves to the other person. Lasting connections only start after the first glitter wears off.
That doesn't mean we can't revel in the newness and wonder of a new relationship. The beginning is always fun and makes us experience life in a way that no other situation does. No matter what our age, it takes us back to times when we were younger and navigating the world for the first time. "Young at Heart" becomes a way of life instead of just a great song. Smells are sweeter, colors are brighter, and everything tastes better. But once that wears off, the important part in deciding to continue the journey with that person is finding a way to continue experiencing pieces of that while showing up as your true Self.
Spend this month enjoying the new glitter, but remember the lasting sparkle comes from your Authentic Self.
But if you're feeling like exploring the Roman bacchanal origin, check out this month's playlist on Spotify!
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